So between the end of my previous job and the beginning of my current job I took a few weeks off. Let’s be clear: by “off” I mean mostly stoned and chilling my ass out. My time off was refreshing and gave me an opportunity to not worry about anybody else’s tech / shit for two whole weeks. It’s been forever since I’ve had the chance to do that and I strongly urge any of you who have the opportunity and means to do it.
In any event, I’m back at my former employer. It’s been a few weeks. So how’s it going? Well it’s going pretty good so far. It’s not exactly the same as before, but in all the ways that really matter to present day me, it’s mostly the same. Sure it’s not perfect and that is evident. But nothing is so that is no longer the stick I choose to measure things against.
I ended up meeting most of my new team in person during my first week and before I left I said to my new boss and the handful of team members left (most had already left for the airport), “It’s really really nice to find myself in a room full of smart people again.” That’s the straight up truth of it. Most of the people on the team are substantially younger than myself which despite the fact I’ve been doing this for 25 years, still has the ability to shock me. Mostly because when I first started coding professionally I was just 20 years old and I was essentially the youngest person in every room I was in. But alas, those days are long gone.
More than anything it feels good being part of something bigger than myself which feels competent. Working anywhere except for yourself means you will almost always end up being part of something bigger than yourself, but over the years I’ve been part of some really stupid shit. This absolutely includes my most recent former employer. Yes they are some nicest people I have ever worked with and for, but they are also desperately misguided. They see tech as the magic pixie dust that will eventually solve all of their problems whereas I see tech as the process by which tools can be created to help people solve their problems.
There is a marked difference between those two perspectives. The first one is akin to dancing around naked in a field and hoping that your indulging of ridiculous levels of ritual will be enough to render all of your real world concerns moot. Life doesn’t work this way. The second one is accepting that like all forms of technology, software basically just creates tools. Tools aren’t always useful and not all tools make sense in all situations. Hence, you have to act accordingly.
My first few weeks have largely been great but not without challenges. It’s been hard relearning and readapting to the way that they’ve done things. It turns out that working over half a decade as a solo practitioner may have denied me some opportunities to learn newer ways of doing things. So I’m a bit behind in that respect. But that’s okay. I started off feeling 110% like an imposter but I’m down to about 70% now. This is primarily the result of the fact that I now work at a place populated with a lot of people who maintain a keen and active interest in the craftsmanship of software. I’m not used to that.
That is what I’ve been missing and what I’m now rediscovering. Deja Vu indeed.